Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Victorian Etiquette

I was reading an article in Seventeen (btw i suggest everybody buy a copy and read it..its too funny for words...especially the 'how to handle ur boyfriend' articles...) about Victorian Etiquette demystified.....it was supposed to be guide for young men to comport themselves with dignity and charm the skirts off those girls...
For your education, all you young men out there, i have reproduced a few of them here...along with my...ahem...views about them.

rule no one - always always hold doors open for women...they are incapable of doing such physically demanding tasks needing a high level of hand-eye co-ordination which most women lack of course...its quite sad...but of course we have to heed the rules of etiquette...who cares if the girl feels like a pet dog or something, always having things done for her?
Always carry a handkerchief to offer to an emotional lady (i swear this was there in the article)...seeing women are expected to break into tears every two seconds it would probably make more sense to carry a pack of tissues...in fact, buy them in bulk....women cant handle stuff except by crying u see..we need our strong men to carry that huge heavy hanky so we can dry our little teary eyes...
Never let a woman walk through a puddle - always lay your jacket across for her to walk on...God forbid her feet get wet...everybody knows women, like the wicked witch in The Wizard of Oz, will melt if they step into a nasty puddle...wat would people say? Of course seeing the amount of puddles we get on our amazing roads, the guys would probably have to carry two jackets and lay them one after the other so the 'lady' can walk on them...ought to give him some exercise...
Never ever let a woman walk across the room or gasp! the road unescorted...how can they walk across an entire road with all those nasty vehicles zooming by all alone? They are like horses with blinkers you see...cant see either side...wud probably forget where they are headed and wander off somewhere...nope...we need the men..
Always offer a lady your seat...right...they might just faint and fall if they are allowed to stand for too long. And the stupid blokes who got there first are expected to be all noble and give up their hard won seat for a lazy ass girl who cudnt get there on time...fat chance...but of course etiquette says women shudnt be allowed to stand...not when theres a loser of a guy whose willing to give up his seat...
Always pay for the lady as well...this is one thing which really gets me pissed off...its like buying off the girl..i can pay my own bills thank you very much...its really very unfair to the guy...just becoz hes the guy he has to pay for everything.....and we have the privilege of feeling like we owe him something. Of course treats are all fine but expecting him to pick up the tab all the time is just plain...i dnt knw.
Most of these are relly stupid when applied to todays world...but u can still see a lot of people religiously following them...whats the point of being all gung-ho about equal rights and all that jazz if all we take are the good parts and leave out the rsponsibilities?
What do we mean when we say that we expect to be treated on par with men and then expect them to hold open doors and give us their seats? Frankly it makes me feel like a useless lump. This whole issue of womens empowerment is a waste of time if we arent ready to face up and say we dont need preferntial treatment and we can shoulder our own burdens. This is not just for trivial issues but for the big issues as well. Equality loses its meaning if we expect to be treated like china which wud be broken. It really annoys the crap out of me when girls are all pro-feminism and and then get all shocked when the guy doesnt pick up her bill as well.
Im not a feminist...im not ready to burn my bra just yet...but i do believe in not being a hypocrite.
Lets try to create an equal world...for EVERYONE!

5 comments:

Billy said...

Thanks for stopping by my place and your sweet comment. When the time comes you'll find yours, it's when you least expect it it seems.

As far as your post, I enjoy opening doors and other such nonsense. I won't lay my jacket in a puddle mind you, I would hope that the two of us are smart enough to walk around it.

I agree, it makes no sense to fight for equal rights and then cry because the men don't treat you like a lady... i.e. opening doors, etc. I'll always do that just because I think it's polite, I'll even hold the door for a guy at a convenience store; it's just being polite.

I'm tired of the whole I'm a woman and I should be treated equally except when..... Either you is or you ain't - what's it gonna be.

Good luck Bored One, at 17 you got a long way to go. Stay true to what you believe whether everyone agrees or not and you'll do fine. There's alot to be said for peace of mind and being able to sleep at night.

re-belle said...

billy -
i agree completely with the good manners part...and yes, i do open doors if im ahead and theres someone behind me....its just that it bugs me when pple do it coz ure a LADY and all....

Anonymous said...

You seem pretty independent for a Chennai girl (and yes, I was one too, so I'm not being patronizing).. where do you study? I didn't think they had any schools that encouraged this sort of thinking. Espescially not in those damn Catholic colleges. Brrr!! Shiver at the memory!!!

re-belle said...

thanks kinsha..and i study in womens christian college...protestant, not catholic not that its any better. and my uniquely quirky way of thinking is all due to me being mad....

re-belle said...

and i studied in chettinad vidyashram...for a school, i must say its ok...and all manner of freaks are to be found there so i felt right at home.